The words we think and the words we say matter. Not only do the words we think produce the words we speak, but our thoughts also shape how we view and interact with the world. A common word in the dog training word is “command.” Something I have done myself and have encouraged others is to replace “command” with “cue.” This subtle change can shift how you interact with the animal you are working with!
With animals and training in mind, commanding an animal to sit creates an expectation to be fulfilled. It creates this sense of the animal NEEDING to complete the task that was commanded. There is no conversation, rather something is said and expected to be completed. This can set the human up to feel angry or frustrated if the animal perhaps does not respond or does a behavior other than the one that was expected by the human. The word command also creates this hierarchal construct of higher and lower ranking individuals.
Utilizing the word “cue” on the other hand opens up the possibility of a conversation and removes the expectation that the animal must complete the ask. Say the human cues the animal to perform a task, however the animal does not respond or does a behavior other than the one that was expected, there is now room for the human to reflect on their behavior and also question why the animal did not respond as expected. This way of talking and thinking creates space for a conversation and a kinder way of interacting with animals.
For me, when I think of the word “command,” I think of a high ranking military officer commanding a lower ranking individual to do a task. There is usually no room for the lower ranking individual to question the officer and there is an expectation that the task must get done and without room for error. On the other hand, when I think of “cue,” I think of theater and an actor/actress looking for and responding to a cue to then perform a certain behavior (ex. speaking a line or movement across the stage). There is still a possibility of missing the cue, however there is less expectation of perfection. If the actor/actress messes up, they just continue to practice and look at what they can do differently to perform better.
I am always looking for ways to improve myself but also the relationships I have with humans and non-human animals alike! I am hoping this subtle change can bring big improvement to your life and your relationships too!
